Showing posts with label pro wrestling. Show all posts
Showing posts with label pro wrestling. Show all posts

Saturday, June 6, 2009

Magnum's Academy of Awesome

Saturday, June 6, 2009 0
In the world of professional wrestling, one name has become synonymous with the word Awesome. That name, of course, is Magnum!

The Innovator of Awesomeness, the Dean of Decadence, Magnum will, for one night only, teach YOU how to be awesome. A once-thought-impossible task, Magnum oozes with the confidence that he can make you a better person.

Magnum, the Pioneer of Perfection, will consult with you, one on one or in small groups, to spread his teachings, guidance, and of course, his awesomeness. A true Maharashi of Magnificence, this modern-day Engineer of Excellence has generously agreed to help you, the less awesome, cast away the unfortunate traits that make-up a classic loser. Only the Captain of Cool himself, the Connoisseur of Class, Magnum is man enough for such a challenge.

Arrive early to ensure you get one of Magnum’s FREE awesome giveaways – a tool that can turn even the biggest loser into an entity of awesomeness. While supplies last!

Don’t miss out on this once-in-a-lifetime opportunity! Buy your tickets at the door when you arrive early!


ECWA Pro Wrestling
Greater Newark Boys' & Girls' Club
109 Glasgow Drive
Rt. 40 & #1 Positive Place
Newark, DE 19702
Doors Open at: 6:30 p.m.
Show Time: 7:30 p.m.
http://ecwaprowrestling.com

Sunday, March 29, 2009

The Magnum Militia is running wild!

Sunday, March 29, 2009 0
With good reason, The Magnum Militia is all the buzz in the world of pro wrestling. The funny thing is, everyone wants to try to figure us out. Don't even bother! But hey, ECWA, speculate all you want. In case you haven't seen it yet, check out ECWA's attempt to get inside the mind of the master manipulator.

Magnum, Pro Wrestler, Still Undefeated

I'm not one to say "I told you so." Oh wait, yes I am! I told you so! Especially you, Jason Leigh. How prophetic were my warnings of 1-2-3! The bell rings, Magnum's and the Magnum Militia's hands are raised, and victory is once again ... ours!!

See you on April 18!

Tuesday, February 24, 2009

Magnum's Thoughts on the 6-Man Tag Spectacular

Tuesday, February 24, 2009 3

It has just been announced that The Magnum Militia (for those of you who haven't been paying attention: that's me, Frederick of Hollywood, and Andrew Ryker) will take on Aden Chambers, Travis Blake, and Jason Leigh at ECWA's March 7, 2009 show. Of course, you're dying to hear my thoughts on this Six-Man Spectacular. Since I am never short on words, here it is.

First, let me get this out of the way. Once again, ECWA management have proved themselves to be malicious, jealous, and inept by putting MANAGER Magnum in a WRESTLING match. Have they not learned their lesson? Have I not beaten every challenge they put up against me? Am I not UNDEFEATED? Let’s get something straight here. In this world there are people like ECWA fans who haven’t accomplished anything in their lives. Then there is a small handful of people who reach awesome status. Then there is me … I am Magnum Awesome! You have to be truly special to earn the “Magnum” intensifier.


Always remember:

Magnum is the Intensifier of Awesomeness!


Aden Chambers. The new darling of the ECWA since his 2008 Super 8 win. I whole-heartedly acknowledge that Chambers stepped up and won the most prestigious tournament in professional wrestling. But just make sure there’s an asterisk next to his "W" because neither Frederick of Hollywood or Andrew Ryker were in that tournament! And hey, neither was yours truly! Magnum is undefeated in case you forgot. In other words: I do NOT lose! Aden, bring your A game … it’ll be nothing for the A-Listers!

Travis Blake. If I remember correctly, the last few times you crossed paths with the Magnum Militia didn’t work out so great for you! Frederick of Hollywood demonstrated his power with his Hollywood Slam, and Andrew Ryker proved his skill as he pinned your shoulders to the mat. They say “third time’s a charm!” … well, it’ll be just that when the ref counts you out 1-2-3.

Jason Leigh. The last time you were in the ring with Magnum you lasted all of 2 seconds. How glorious you looked, flying over the top rope and crashing to the hard, unforgiving floor. You may be breaking out of your green shell, but you still have lots of work ahead of you if you want to try to climb Militia Mountain. Tell you what … before the match I’ll dial 911 so that the ambulance shows up just in time to carry you out!

So as you can see, dear Militia wannabees ... Magnum is not worried. The Militia is not worried. And you should not be worried since the undefeated streak WILL CONTINUE!!!

Get your tickets now!

Monday, February 23, 2009

Magnum Militia in 6-Man Tag Match

Monday, February 23, 2009 0
Just announced! Your hero Magnum, along with Frederick of Hollywood and Andrew Ryker, will take on 2008 Super 8 winner Aden Chambers, Travis Black, and Jason Leigh. I have LOTS to say about this match ... I will post my most-awesome diatribe later today!

Sunday, February 22, 2009

ECWA Pro Wrestling March 7, 2009 Show

Sunday, February 22, 2009 0
Hey there Militia Wannabees ... looks like the line-up for ECWA's March 7, 2009 is slowly leaking out. Rest assured you'll get your money's worth as the Magnum Militia will be in FULL FORCE. That's right ... we will ALL be UNITED in a 6-man tag team match.

More details to come! Stay tuned!

Friday, January 23, 2009

Pre-show Autograph Signing

Friday, January 23, 2009 0
Don't forget to come out early! If you're lucky enough, we'll let you behind the red ropes. Dare to dream!

Monday, January 19, 2009

Bounty on Freak Nastty

Monday, January 19, 2009 1
On January 24, 2009 most of the ECWA locker room will compete for a chance to destroy Freak Nastty later in the night, and the opportunity to collect more money than any of you have ever seen. Come out to the show to see it all go down!

Locks of Love Challenge!

It promises to be a wild, energetically charged, all out war on January 24, 2009 when The Chick Magnets meet Del Monte and the Logan Brothers in a contest that will leave one team proud in victory and the other team sent home in humiliating defeat.

Read how this match came about here.

Leather N Lace Defend Against Mega and Cha Cha Chance

On January 24, 2009 he ECWA Tag Team Champions will have their hands full when they defend the titles against the most popular team in recent ECWA history. Size, power and 4 larger than life characters collide with different styles but one objective: leaving the arena as Tag Team Champions. Who will prevail?

Read more on this gigantic tag title match here.

Sunday, January 11, 2009

Want our autographs?

Sunday, January 11, 2009 0
Of course you do! The Magnum Militia will be signing autographs BEFORE the ECWA show on January 24, 2009. Come by and get one of the following if we let you behind the red ropes. We make no promises.


Thursday, January 1, 2009

Magnum Bobblehead - Awesome Christmas Gift #1

Thursday, January 1, 2009 0
While most of you aren't worthy, aren't awesome enough to warrant a visit from Santa, Magnum did pretty darn well this holiday season. Jealous? I'm sure. Who wouldn't want a custom-made, one-of-a-kind Magnum bobblehead? Look at the pose! Awesome.

Stay tuned for more examples of what Santa brings only the coolest of people.

Thursday, December 4, 2008

Bitter-sweet

Thursday, December 4, 2008 0

A week has now passed since ECWA’s November 22 show where the Magnificent One, Magnum, went one on one with Freak Nastty in a steel cage. Also that night The Frederick of Hollywood defended his title against Tommy Trouble. The night started off with a whirlwind victory and reveal, and ended with a shock heard round the squared circle. Since these two events resulted in two drastically different emotions, I shall address each separately below.

Unleashing the Beast

What did I tell you? What did I TELL you! Everyone at ECWA’s November 22, 2008 show got to bear witness to the awesomeness that is Magnum. Lock me in a cage; surround me with Blue Steel; back me into a corner and I will unleash the beast within and attack with unbridled vengeance.

Freak Nastty … you fooled me into signing a match with you in a steel cage. Duped me into thinking I was getting ownership of the ECWA. Well, the joke is on you! I walked into the cage undefeated, and I walked out of the cage undefeated.

Oh, how it all played out. It was the most innovative, the most diabolical, the most awesome plan ever put together in all of professional wrestling. It was 10 months in the making and it was the best kept secret in wrestling. We had all the idiots in the locker room fooled, and we had all the idiot fans fooled. Andrew Ryker has made his way to the A-List … Andrew Ryker is the newest member of the Magnum Militia … Andrew Ryker is the man who attacked Freak Nastty! You want to hate him for it, but you can’t help but love him because he is that good. But save your applause … you don’t deserve to cheer for Andrew Ryker.

The Magnum Militia is truly awesome. With yours truly, The Frederick of Hollywood, and now Andrew Ryker … we can not be stopped. Never before has there been, and never again will there be such an awesome assembly of A-List talent. Accept it. We are stronger than all of you … we are smarter than all of you … and without a shadow of a doubt, we are better looking than all of you.

Ladies and gentlemen … the Magnum Militia reigned supreme in the steel cage, we destroyed the MYTH of Freak Nastty, and we’re looking forward to a bright future … the future’s so bright, we gotta wear shades!

The Frederick of Hollywood Vs. Tommy Trouble

Where do I begin? For once your hero, your role model Magnum is at a loss for words. I am still dejected, still bewildered, and still angry about what went down on November 22, 2008. And believe me, you don’t want to come face to face with an angry Magnum.

Everything was set in place, but somehow it all went terribly wrong. Tommy Trouble is a talented, strong, and formidable force in the ECWA. But he is not an A-Lister. Tommy’s trouble is that he cares what you fans think. He cares about doing the right thing. He needs to take more care in his style and personality. But I digress…

Freak Nastty’s little interference was just one kink in our chain. And Freak, you better watch that back of yours that keeps getting attacked because you messed with the wrong group. But something else went wrong that night. Someone messed with destiny. Someone’s un-divine intervention led to the rarest of rare mistakes by a member of the Magnum Militia.

But know this … no one, NO ONE outsmarts Magnum. Vengeance will be ours, and we will have that belt back soon enough.

Friday, November 21, 2008

Magnum - Professional Wrestler

Friday, November 21, 2008 0
That's right. MANAGER Magnum is entering singles action, tomorrow, November 22, 2008. The ECWA is once again trying to one-up Magnum, but they forget -- amazingly so -- just how awesome he is. He is currently UNDEFEATED in the squared circle and has no intentions on changing that status. Be there or be squared-circle.

Tuesday, November 18, 2008

The clock ticks down for Freak Nastty

Tuesday, November 18, 2008 0
Tick Tock Freak Nastty! If that IS your real name... are you ready for Saturday? You better come prepared. I fear no man, and believe me when I say, I can take you out 6 different ways from the fetal position.

Friday, November 7, 2008

Magnum is on a tear

Friday, November 7, 2008 0
ECWA fans are in for a treat. Magnum has been training non-stop. He's undoubtedly faster, stronger, and obviously smarter than the rest of the locker room. Thanks to the in-ring guidance of ECWA Heavyweight Champion, Frederick of Hollywood, Magnum is certain to continue his unbeaten streak.

Don't miss the most awesome night pro wrestling has ever seen ... be there. November 22, 2008.

Thursday, November 6, 2008

Steel Cage Match Vs. Freak Nastty: ECWA November 22, 2008

Thursday, November 6, 2008 0

Redefining the steel cage match

Since Magnum is in a steel cage match, you know it won't be any ordinary steel cage match. In fact, let's redefine it: The "Blue Steel Cage Match" in honor of my good friend and colleague, Derrick Zoolander.

Wednesday, November 5, 2008

Frederick of Hollywood Vs. Tommy Trouble

Wednesday, November 5, 2008 0
Tommy Trouble. Young, strong, talented ... and now you've got a shot at the ECWA Heavyweight Title. Tommy, what you possess with the above-mentioned attributes, you lack in smarts. Now, compared to the average Delawarean, you're freakin' Einstein. But when you go head to head with the mastermind that is Magnum, you're still in nursery school. You will learn soon enough that the combined forces of Frederick of Hollywood & Magnum, the A-Team, if you will, is unbeatable. Come with everything you've got, leave it all in the ring, and we'll make sure someone's there to carry you out of the arena.

Frederick is living the Hollywood life ... but you Tommy Trouble ... you are just California Dreaming!

Tuesday, November 4, 2008

Training Injury

Tuesday, November 4, 2008 0
Ouch. While working on my new and improved finishing move (don’t worry, you’ll get to see it) I stubbed my toe. No worries … A quick trip to the pedicurist will have it fixed in a jiffy. Just in time for my to shove my boot down Freak’s throat!
 
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